better, just a bit.

So i realized that i sounded like a lil bit of a complainy loser in my last blog.

Wade thanks for the support. i did do some yelling( the other night) and then i meditated i feel better about my place/ mind/ body. Everything now feels a bit more insync.(less tense) Not totally better but better. i don't need a whore (i'm fine there). you are right music will come. Ahh just one of those days.

To be honest i am in some of the best shape of my life and i am pretty happy about that. More work to do, but all in good time.

So i had a weird dream about walking on my hands. So i decided that it is my newest goal is to walk 5 steps on my hands by the end of this school year. I think this will really help me get in touch with my balance making dance easier. (less falling down lol)

We shall see i think it would be a neat ability to have.

what can i say? i feel better today than other day. i was just kinda off.

Kwanza is coming for wade... lol Christmas for me. I'll build some stuff, hang with the cat, see the friends it'll be good.

So yes bloggy goodness.

back to cleaning up and working on my movement project.

if life gives you lemons make lemonade. If life gives you pickles you better give up cuz pickleade is disgusting.

Joel

the longest joel post

Ok lads and ladies, (warning spelling and grammer and punctuation errors ahead)

IT'S POSTIN' TIME. YEEHAW. What can i say... i left the hills but i still a hill billy deep down.

I am feeling fat. What you think about that? Pooooorrr unsuccessful and fat. (tribute nick) That's a comedy song just so you guys know.

Honestly i dunno i've never had a good body image i know. what can you do? it's hard to work with that you are given at times. I am doing really good with what i have but i'll never be small waisted and tall. I gotta give up dreaming. As i tell many people i am not leading man pretty or attractive. Supporting actor maybe? sure why not.

Theory= ok now i guess. ear training= awful i can hear and dupilcate, no problem. i know when i am off key very easily. But rythmic /melodic dictation i just can't do it yet. ahh sweet moronic joel. Well i have to say we have our shit and it's to deal with. THat makes little sense but i like it.

Why is it i feel i am supposed to be something great but i reach mediocity? i was happy...ish with my midterm marks 75.5 in dance so far. (-B) and B in vocal. Who i mannaged that i dunno.

I don't know how to play a 70 year old preist with no legs... my scene with wayne i have one liners and that's not hard to memorize as long as the line before me is correct. i am just curious if i am helping wayne enough and the right way so he can get his lines down... i dunno i am bad teacher. He's got the bulk of the scene on his shoulders...*looks contimplaively*

I just want a challenge and i want tim to tell me i suck give me a ton or tonne to work on. i want to be pushed. Am i being pushed am i doing good work? people say it's good... but it's not Fucking awesome. Tim says it'll be good or it's good to everything i show him but does that equate to me succeeding? Does that mean he's happy? does that mean i have nothing to work on or i am just not ready to be fucking awesome and never will? what does it mean? anyone?

i'm really going on a weird rant tonight arn't i?

I get to sing don't fence me in for juries. I am excited like the song
I need to know what the dance jury piece is i want to work on it.

i need to work for movement class. I will tomorrow night and sunday. Earth is my element i think

I honestly think about what people think of me, and do they say things about me? i know i shouldn't care but honestly folks i am not always happy sunshine. I am a Scared paranoid lil nothing that just over thinks a tonne of crap. Part of my brain says to me " you can slice a man in two with a sword and not care... but i'd never be able to hurt a animal. Is it wrong to value a cat over a human life? in the case of you VS him sure i guess.... this is getting creepy.

New topic. Is this the longest post i ever wrote or what?

I was reading Jason's blog and he mentioned the fact that most of the 1 st years are very messy. i just wanted to say at this time i agree and think it's gross. i personally try to stay very clean. But that's cuz i am a kitchen/food nazi.


1/2 the year almost over. Jingle bell time ect. i wanat build stuff.

anyhoo bed probibly soon.

Joel

Ahhh Civic duties.

Ok so i made it to 2 of 3 elections. i missed mayorial due to school. So Pc majority in alberta.... Well i expected that. But If those damn 18-25 year olds got out and voted more we would of had a better chance at making it less of Ralphie's fun land. If any of my friends are PC sorry but i am not a fan of king ralph. So lowest voter turn out ever... 45% not good Alberta...Not good enough. I am kinda sick about people complaining but not doing what they can to change it. EI. NOT VOTING!

Anyhoo... So my monologue night was the other night small gathering of people to watch the class at the city center campus. Good times. After it was done i realized that i did not pick the most difficult monologue that i could have. i wish now i picked something more challenging. ohwell hinesigh(i don't know if that's the right spelling don't critize me for it.) is 20/20. I did the monologue well but again not challenging enough.

So what else.. it's almost Shopping season, who am i kidding it is shopping season for the gifts and the what not. i hope i have enought time with the school going till the 17th and 6 days aweek. ahh the life. Well i tihnk i am out of things to rant about for now.

Joel

ummmm pointless

Well it seems i am posting again. But for who? it seems like myself. oh well. So i flopped a bit i am realyl trying to focus in but i am just not pulling it in. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

So my days off were great had some good times seeing friends.
sorry to those who haven't been seen in a while. but start booking your christmas joel seeing occasion.

Ummm what else to tell you? please comment on what are things you guys wanna here from me.

i miss comments.

Joel

will post more when i remember what i wanna say.

smash

So my window got broken. My back window for my car got broken while at the Olive Garden this halloween. I was not impressed. But what can i say? Took me calling lots of glass places and lots of junk yards to find out that there were no pieces of glass that size in edmonton. It looked like it was going to cost over 200$ to get the glass orderand made alone installation woulda been an extra 80$. BUT it turned out when i called the Spruce grove junk yard they had it! so i only spent 50$ so happy times on that. But still didn't wanna spend 50$ but can't have a broken window in winter my car is too cold to begin with. So today i am attempting to fix my window before i got to school. We shall see how that works. School is going ok pretty happy with it.

songs i am singing to catch you guys up
Don't Fence me in - Hollywood canteen
Come to me bend to me- Brigadoon
Quasimodo-when pigs fly
I don't remember Christmas- Starting here Starting now

and that's the last of the songs for this semester.

i got to go fix that window now so ttyl

Joel